Clutter affects every aspect of our lives. From our mental, emotional well-being to our relationships to what we are teaching our kids, clutter is at the core of so many of our issues. I’ve lived with clutter for so many years that I’ve learned what the true cost is in my life. Not just the cost of the items I’ve purchased, but what it really is costing me.
Of course, there is the actual cost of each item. but I have purchased many items twice or three times because I could not find where the item was when I needed it. I’ve paid to move the clutter to new houses. I’ve paid storage lockers to store my stuff. I’m not even about to figure out what percentage our garage is of our home’s total square footage – but that garage is all storage for my clutter not cars.
However, that is probably the smallest cost of clutter.
At one point not that long ago, my daughter asked why I had moved the side table next to our couch. Ummm, I hadn’t. What I had moved was the pile of boxes that were there. Of course, we laughed about it, but come on….those boxes had been there long enough that she thought they were furniture and we were putting our drinks on them. At this point in my life, I had stopped having people over because I was ashamed at how messy my house had become. My friendships and social life had stagnated because I didn’t want them to know how bad my clutter problem had become.
Besides not having people over, I felt worthless about it. I had failed as a wife and homemaker. Allowing anyone inside was just admitting this publicly.
The amount of clutter in every room also caused me great amounts of stress. Not in the ‘oh I need to clean things up’ way – but actual physical stress. I could not be in certain rooms anymore because my mind could not process all of the visual clutter in that area. Inside, my mind was also cluttered. You know that saying, “As within, so without.” (Your outside world is really an exact reflection of your inner world.) So very true with me and clutter. I was paralyzed by the clutter. I could not make decisions, or make changes in my life….there was just too much there to change inside my mind and outside on the floor.
I was frozen, unable to even conceive where to begin getting organized. There were countless times I would get up with the intent to declutter only to find myself in tears only a few moments later. My mind was unable to deal with the amount of stuff that I had. I knew I was willing to get rid of things, but I had no idea where to even begin. I felt that every attempt at working through the piles of stuff became a game I refer to as ‘the clutter shuffle’. Moving items from room to room or pile to pile didn’t really solve anything or make any real headway. My self-esteem was incredibly low at this point.
I think the worst cost for me though has been what I’ve taught my daughter so far about stuff. The importance of stuff in our lives. She feels she has to purchase something, even if it is just then lost to the piles. It had totally gotten out of hand. This past month we went through her stuffed animals and picked some out to donate. We took out 3 garbage bags of stuffed animals from her room. Three full garbage bags. Seriously, who needs that many stuffed animals. AND she still has a lot left.
Clutter has caused countless arguments and tension between my spouse and myself. I’ve also yelled at my daughter about cleaning up her room. None of that makes me proud. Clutter has absolutely permeated every area of my life.
Last April we moved into a new home. All of the non-essential items were stored in the garage. For months, I walked around my pretty much empty home thinking how much lighter I felt. How lucky I was to have this beautiful home. Then it dawned on me, it wasn’t the home (although it is beautiful), it was the space….the lack of clutter. Over the past year, clutter from the garage has crept in and I find myself getting stressed out again. Yelling, arguing, suffocating from all the stuff.
I know clutter has to be dealt with. It is affecting too much in my life to be ignored any longer. Join me on this decluttering journey. Let’s clear some space in our homes and in our lives again.
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